It means that you are fearing what others are thinking about you. People with high self-esteem know that they are unique, that there is no way they could be compared to anybody else. Your uniqueness expresses itself also in the certainty that nobody outside yourself can really know who you are. It doesn’t matter to them what others think about them.
At first glance it might be easier to determine what kind of self-esteem others have than to recognize our own self-esteem. People may even speak about the self-esteem of others as an instrument of power.
In fact nobody can see everything inside another person. We can’t make judgements about somebody else’s self-esteem. This should make us cautious when we hear people speaking about others.
On the other hand we can experience an increase on our own self-esteem when we offer positive words about other people and their self-esteem freely and honestly. Speaking well of others with empathy makes our self-esteem grow.
Sometimes we judge other people and their behavior faster than we think. We see how they behave in the office or at home, we see them eating or speaking and immediately we make judgements about them. At the same time we don’t love to be judged ourselves so easily.
Did you ever think about the reasons for judging another? It seems to make life easier when we judge and classify. We don’t have to think anymore about their behavior because our judgement makes them predictable. At the other side when we are judged we feel how difficult it is to change made opinions about us. Nobody is one type in each life situation, nobody should be locked in unchangeable judgement.
Esteem teaches us to leave away these thoughts of judgements. It keeps our eyes open for other people. Esteem doesn’t judge because it’s important to stay unbiased toward others. It’s important for esteem to give everybody the chance to change their behavior, to learn and to grow.
An esteem-full approach makes you open-minded toward others such as you’d like others to be toward you.