Change is the only constant in life. Knowing this life wisdom we can be accepting and even happy toward each change we undertake in our life. It’s the subtle changes we make in our life, rather than the big changes that I’m referring to.
What does change mean to you? Through change we develop understanding of ourselves by going through various life moments. We learn from our mistakes and we address them as we see fit.
Continue reading Never be afraid of change
In Wikipedia I read that self-esteem encompasses beliefs, emotions and behavior, it comprises our whole personality.
Self-esteem doesn’t depend on external actions or experiences. Contrarily, it is the manner of handling external actions. How you act, how you think, how you feel, every move of your personality is an expression of your self-esteem.
I like the picture of having self-esteem in each cell of our body. It makes self-esteem corporal and mental at the same time. With all our cells we live and express self-esteem. Everybody should have a highly developed self-esteem.
Continue reading Self-esteem comprises our whole personality
Making fun of others seems to be a sport for some people. Children learn that it’s ok to make fun of others because they see it on television each day.
Ridicule is the extreme end of making fun. Ridicule creates bad feelings for the people who are its target.
Expressing fun in this way has nothing to do with esteem.
Esteem never makes fun of people. Picture a personality toward whom you have the utmost respect. It could be a political leader, an athlete, a religious leader or someone in your family. It’s impossible to think of making fun of this person, isn’t it?
Esteem is a genuine expression of our respect toward people. Esteemful acts can be fun but always in a respectful way.
The speed and manner of how we develop ourselves often depends on how courageously we push our own limits.
For self-knowledge it’s important to know what we’re capable of doing but also to know our limits. A healthy self-esteem works inside these limits as a consequence of knowing and accepting our own capabilities.
But there are moments in life when we have to push our limits for healthy growth of our personality.
Motivational speaker Tom Krause expressed it with the following words: ” If you only do what you know you can do, you never do very much.”
Being able to push our own limits in a healthy way is important and needs to have its place in our life in order to let our personality and self-esteem grow.
When we break down the word “encouragement” we find the word “courage” in it. Encouraging others means planting the seed of courage in their lives.
We can experience this by giving esteem. Encouraging esteem can have the form of a heartening smile as well as comforting words. Esteem creates the feeling of being supported – by being accepted.
Giving esteem always means giving attention. Just by receiving attention people feel themselves as being precious, which in turn causes them to be more self-sure about what they are and what they are doing. Isn’t there any better expression of encouragement? People who receive esteem receive courage for their own life, for their own personality. Sometimes they need just a small sign of esteem to realize that they’re on the right way.
Through your esteem toward people you plant the seed of courage in them.
When we say that a high self-esteem defeats loneliness we don’t mean that you’ll never be alone.
There is an important difference between between being lonely and being alone which is defined by the strength of our self-esteem.
We can’t be lonely with a high self-esteem. Dr. Wayne Dyer expressed it this way: “You cannot be lonely if you like the person you are alone with”.
A high self-esteem makes us content with ourselves. Knowing and liking ourselves allows us to be alone without feeling lonely.
It’s easy to fall into the habit of constantly comparing ourselves with others. This eternal comparing can be destructive for our self-esteem because it leads us away from ourselves.
Every single person is a unique personality with their own talents. How can you compare two beings that are unique?
There are moments in life where it’s helpful to learn how other people handle life’s challenges. We can choose to emulate them as our model.
We can still maintain our own personality while learning from the experience of others and applying that knowledge to our own life.
Inspiring examples can help encourage our self-esteem.
In a world where the most outgoing people seem to get the most attention shyness could be considered an undesirable trait. Some people even make the connection between shyness and low self-esteem.
In time we come to learn this isn’t necessarily true. There are shy people and there are outgoing people, and shyness doesn’t necessarily mean low self-esteem.
It’s okay to have a shy personality. These people should stay as they are, because it’s an expression of their own personality. Shyness can be compatible with a high self-esteem.
Shyness can on the other hand originate from bad life experiences or low self-confidence. In these cases, shyness is not considered a positive part of the personality.
Developing a high self-esteem can lead one to overcome this kind of shyness.
We could find hundreds of tips on how to express esteem. But truly we have to recognize that it’s always our own expression when we give esteem. It’s our unique personality and our unique way of putting an acknowledgment into words.
Receiving tips about esteem is the same as getting advice. As long as we take them as general help we can use it in our own way – for our own unique life situation.
Giving esteem should always come from you because it would otherwise feel artificial. To express esteem genuinely and honestly we need to give it through our own personality.
With this in mind, take a tip of smiling as a sign of esteem and make it your own – unique and personal.
There is a misunderstanding about self-esteem which seems to affect how we speak about it.
On the one hand our self-esteem is outwardly manifested through how we express our personality. On the other hand our self-esteem is rooted in our inner space which we keep to ourselves.
This seeming contradiction is also reflected in words and actions. Whatever we think, say and do is at once both centered in our self-understanding and expressed to the outer world.
Considering this fact we should be always aware of how we speak, think and act because it has an effect on our own self-esteem and on the people around us.