This might sound a little out there “Learn to tolerate your self-esteem”, but it actually nails it.
Low self-esteem is usually due to a psychological attachment to being perceived in a negative light. By constantly seeing you in a negative light you learned a powerful lesson – that your existence is a negative.
The real problem though lies in the fact that as child you trusted the opinion of others and now you continue to trust the judgments of others. At this point, the black hole of negativity in your psyche is quite powerful and you may have a very difficult time shaking the emotional attachment to all the negativity.
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How often do we hear the phrase “one person can make a difference”? Each big change starts with one small step. Somebody just has to make that first step.
When you give esteem toward the people you meet during your day you don’t always see the consequences. A life maxim says: do something positive with perseverance and conviction and after a certain time your little action will generate positive results.
Big or small, change can begin with one step, or in this case a dance step. One happy person, listening to music and dancing freely in a meadow keeps on dancing until he’s created a whole chain reaction. This is a great lesson to carry with us when we think about making esteemful actions.
Marianne Williamson writes about that which touches the deepest core of esteem and self-esteem. There is nothing we could add to it.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
This quotation is from the book A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles” by Marianne Williamson.
When we think of esteem as powerful we don’t mean that it gives us the ability to exercise power over other people.
First of all a powerful esteem doesn’t look at the person giving esteem. It gives attention to the person getting esteem. Herein lies the true power of esteem – creating a great moment for somebody else.
The power of esteem isn’t to reign but to serve. The person giving esteem steps back and pushes the person receiving esteem to the fore.
We can take this one step further and say that power is only genuine power when it’s filled with esteem.