Tag Archives: self-confident

When the wind of change blows …

Change by Jeffrey A. KottlerThere is an ancient Chinese proverb that goes: “When the wind of change blows, some people build walls, others build windmills.”

Change can cause people to become frightened.  They want to stay with what’s known even when it’s rendered obsolete.

Life teaches us that the only constant is change.  We make changes all the time, some big and some small.  The big changes may be frightening because they mean that life will never be exactly the same.

Continue reading When the wind of change blows …

Can we change other people?

We don’t change other people, people change themselves.  But a healthy self-esteem can be a positive example to encourage others to make their own changes.

Having a high self-esteem means that we are self-confident in what we are and what we do in a healthy way.  This means that we don’t overestimate our abilities but that we have a deep self-understanding of failure and success as being part of our life.  This life wisdom emerges from a high self-esteem and can help people around us to undertake the effort for a positive change in their own lives.

We often experience that it’s easier to lead by example than by words.  When people see us handling life situations calmly and self-confidently they are more likely to do the same.  This is the only way we can help others to realize changes in their attitudes and lives.

Self-esteem and self-concept

We have a certain picture of ourselves with which we try to define our attitudes, believes and opinions.  This picture can be weak and fragile or strong and self-confident.

How we think about ourselves is called our self-concept.

To find out what your self-concept is answer questions such as “What do I want to reach in my life?” or “How successful am I in my life?”.

Self-concept isn’t the same as self-esteem even when both are closely linked to each other.

Self-esteem touches the emotional aspect of our self.  The picture we have about ourselves is filled with feelings and impressions – and self-judgments.

To find out what our self-esteem is answer questions such as “Am I an important person for my job or family?” or “Do I have unshakable trust in my abilities?”.

With our self-esteem we judge our self-concept .  With high self-esteem we judge ourselves honestly.

In quiet moments of life we can listen to our inner voice speaking about our self-concept and self-esteem and assuring us that both aren’t unalterable.  Our self-concept grows through our life as well as our self-esteem.  It’s up to us to give this growth the right direction.


Make your list of important things in your life

It’s the time of the year when people start to make lists of resolutions for the coming year.  This year, I’ve decided to try something different.  I’ve made a list of the things that are important to me in life.

If you had to make a list of the most important things in your life, what would be on it? 

You’ll find out how important things are when you make your list and then imagine that you don’t have them. 

Two of the items on my list are Good Health and of course, Esteem.

Health is one of the most important things for all of us.  You may not think of it as long as you’re feeling great,  but when health is absent then you only think of getting healthy again.

Esteem is another life theme which is essential for a happy life.  When you don’t get esteem you feel unhappy.  When esteem is part of your life you’re balanced and self-confident.

This year, maybe you can make your own list of important things in your life. 

Top 5 steps on the path for living esteem

Esteem in our daily life is very important.   We made our own practical “To-Do-List” of the top 5 steps leading toward a life with esteem.  Here are the five basic steps with which we can realize esteem in our life.

Step 1: Building up self-esteem.

Self-esteem means basically our thoughts about ourselves and not the thoughts and opinions of others.  Self-esteem is another word for self-confidence and self-trust.  I had to honestly ask myself “What is your self-trust?  How self-confident am I?  In order to answer those questions I had to examine the source of my self-esteem.

I started by asking what kind of pictures I held of myself.  It’s important that you realize the first pictures you get are most of all measured, rated and judged.  I threw out the images of what somebody else told me about myself.  To realize real self-esteem you have to forget these outer judgments.  This is how we grew up, how we learned it.  We all do the same way at first.  But at some point It’s time to correct these outer opinions and discover our true self-esteem.  It’s a dialog that’s only within you.

I took inventory of myself and sincerely asked: Where am I good?  Which are the activities I really like to do?  I didn’t waste time worrying if they were “reasonable”, “unpractical” or whatever judgment I could give.  Forget evaluations.  It’s all about experiences, inner personal thoughts, unique talents, just as they are without any valuation.

Continue reading Top 5 steps on the path for living esteem

Narcissistic people as leaders?

A study from the Ohio State University found that people with narcissistic attitudes tend to assume leaderships roles and are often chosen by others.

Narcissistic people  are by definition self-centered and overconfident in their own abilities.
Having a healthy high self-esteem can also mean being strongly self-confident in one’s own abilities.  Persons with a high self-esteem tend to be harmonically balanced in their mental center.

There is one important difference between being narcissistic and having a high self-esteem.  Persons with a high self-esteem don’t exaggerate their self-confidence nor are they self-centered.  The most important difference is the lack of empathy by the narcissistic people.

Persons with a high self-esteem take care of others by giving esteem.  In reality these persons are natural leaders if they have the talent of leading.

True leadership is characterized by empathy, a leading talent and self-esteem.