We ask ourselves who we are. And we ask ourselves: what are we supposed to do with our life?
Before we answer this question we need to know what our talents are. What do we really love to do?
Maybe for some people it’s not easy to answer this because so many of us have practical reasons for choosing a particular job.
Maybe we have to think back to our childhood or teenage years to find out what we loved to do.
Continue reading Self-esteem creates a Self-knowledge
As follow-up to my post Self-esteem and self-handicapping I like to add some thoughts about the positive counterpart of self-handicapping. It’s about self-knowledge.
One of the most impressive systems that tries to explain personality traits and helping to find self-knowledge – I even don’t know if I can call it system – is the Enneagram of Personality or just simply called Enneagram.
It understands the human psyche as typology of 9 interconnected personality types.
Continue reading Esteem for Enneagram – Steps to self-knowledge
The speed and manner of how we develop ourselves often depends on how courageously we push our own limits.
For self-knowledge it’s important to know what we’re capable of doing but also to know our limits.
A healthy self-esteem works inside these limits as a consequence of knowing and accepting our own capabilities.
But there are moments in life when we have to push our limits for healthy growth of our personality.
Continue reading Push your limits
“Gnothi seauton” is a Greek aphorism which was inscribed on the entry porch of Apollo’s temple at Delphi. It means “know yourself”. Why was it written in Apollo’s temple? For the Greek philosopher Socrates this was an important part of his philosophy. According to Apollo, self-knowledge is the most important knowledge we should pursue.
“Gnothi seauton” expresses self-awareness and says that when we understand ourselves we understand other humans as well.
Understanding ourselves is the first and most basic step toward a healthy self-esteem.
Continue reading Self-esteem and Self-awareness
Embarrassment can happen anytime. All of us have experienced this feeling at least once in our lives. Some people deal so easily with embarrassing moments that we wonder how they do it.
How much we take embarrassing moments to heart depends on our self-confidence.
A strong self-confidence tells us that we shouldn’t take life and ourselves too seriously. When it’s not important what other people think of us we don’t take embarrassing moments so hard.
Having a strong self-confidence means having a strong self-esteem. We don’t need to compare ourselves to find out who we are and how good we are. A strong self-esteem means we don’t get upset by embarrassing moments.
You know exactly what to do when you want to lose weight. You eat healthier and exercise more.
Do you know what to do to raise your self-esteem?
There’s a surprisingly simple idea for how to raise your self-esteem: be conscious of yourself. In certain life situations you have to ask yourself “how do I experience myself in this situation?” Self-esteem is based on self-knowledge. The more we understand ourselves the stronger our self-esteem will be.
Taking care of your self-esteem means putting more attention on how we experience ourselves in life situations. With desire and perseverance the result will be strong self-esteem.
Group pressure is something each of us experience at least once in our life. The time in life when group pressure is most significant is during our teenage years.
Succumbing to group pressure is a negative expression of wanting to be accepted by a group. This is a very social and natural drive in us. How can we handle group pressure without losing our unique identity?
Continue reading Self-esteem carries Self-confidence
Intuition is little known part of our personality. According to its Latin roots it means “in to you”. This may be the reason why so many people don’t know anything about it – it’s hidden in us.
Intuition is like an inner voice that inexplicably points us in a certain direction.
When we learn to rely on external advice to find our way through life we reduced our ability to listen to this inner voice.
Intuition doesn’t always give us the whole answer, it only gives a hint, a mysterious picture or a certain feeling.
To be able to listen to our intuition and even more to give it an important place in our life we need to have a healthy self-esteem.
Having a high self-esteem means that we have also a strong self-knowledge. When self-esteem and self-knowledge handle each other with love and acceptance we recognize our personality analytically but also intuitively.
A high elf-esteem boosts our intuition. Intuition, once accepted, can lead us wisely on our way through life. This trust helps to develop our self-esteem even more.
Self-esteem and intuition are like twins, sometimes separated but always wishing to be close to each other.
It seems like today there is no area of life free of competition, rankings or ratings. Whether it’s sports, art, education, a job or even a family gathering. At this time of the year, one of the best examples of rankings center place in culture is American Idol.
Rankings work by comparison. Who is smarter, more skillful or just better – we compare others ceaselessly.
For ourselves, rankings mean making outer judgments which can hurt our self-esteem.
When we want to keep our self-esteem strong we can develop a serene and calm attitude toward rankings.
Realizing that all rankings and all judgements made through comparisons are just outer views we understand that none of them can embrace our whole personality.
With our self-knowledge and self-confidence we can be indifferent to rankings because we know that they don’t touch our real self.
The word “self-handicapping” was first used in psychological studies 30 years ago. It describes a certain attitude of how people handle failures.
Self-handicapping is about cheating ourselves. When facing failure people can make all kinds of excuses without acknowledging that they could have done more to achieve success.
Self-handicapping means that people defend themselves by talking about all the reasons why they couldn’t possibly succeed.
A high self-esteem doesn’t know this self-handicapping attitude. With a high self-esteem we don’t need to defend our failure because we have enough self-confidence to know that we did our best.
We don’t need to find excuses when something doesn’t work out as we thought. Our self-esteem, based on self-knowledge, gives us confidence and calmness.
For a person with a healthy self-esteem failure never means loss of esteem because giving ourselves esteem always means having strength to face new goals and new efforts toward success.