It means that you are fearing what others are thinking about you. People with high self-esteem know that they are unique, that there is no way they could be compared to anybody else. Your uniqueness expresses itself also in the certainty that nobody outside yourself can really know who you are. It doesn’t matter to them what others think about them.
When we say that a high self-esteem defeats loneliness we don’t mean that you’ll never be alone.
There is an important difference between between being lonely and being alone which is defined by the strength of our self-esteem.
We can’t be lonely with a high self-esteem. Dr. Wayne Dyer expressed it this way: “You cannot be lonely if you like the person you are alone with”.
A high self-esteem makes us content with ourselves. Knowing and liking ourselves allows us to be alone without feeling lonely.
Trusting in other people open-heartedly is considered by some as naivete or gullibility. We can also think of trusting in others as children do, with openness and basic kindness, just believing in the good in man as if there is no malevolence possible.
Including esteem in our life makes us believe the best about people. There is no suspicious thinking because our first intention toward people is always to give esteem.
Acknowledging others for their just being here, for their preciousness and unique abilities in an open-hearted way lets us see the good side in them.
It’s always our decision how we want to think about others. When we stay cautious toward them we expect and attract possible negative reactions.
When we give others the trust of being kind-hearted and basically good we’ll receive positive reactions as an answer.
Esteem creates esteem through its trusting and believing in the good in man.
The New York Times started a weekly series called “One in 8 million“.
Each week one person out of the 8 million citizens of New York is portrayed with his passions and problems, relationships and routines, vocations and obsessions.
Reading the stories it reminds us that every single person is precious, has their own life story, their own personality and unique talents.
Features like this cast light on the importance of having respect toward others even when we don’t know them personally. It makes us realize that for others we are strangers too. As we cherish the uniqueness of ourselves, we allow the uniqueness of others.
Stories like “One in a 8 million” raise our awareness of how ordinary people deserve our esteem as much as anybody else.
In a society where many people define themselves through work being jobless is a difficult situation. Being jobless also threatens our existence on a material level.
In a time of joblessness self-esteem often suffers deeply.
When we give unconditional esteem toward ourselves we have to admit that regardless of our employment situation our character doesn’t change. We still are precious and unique human beings worthy of esteem.
It’s often in moments of crisis that we have the chance to make a new start. Each stopping point in our life marks the end of an old path and the beginning of a new path.
Our self-confidence tells us that we still are in charge because we know ourselves to be precious and esteemed. While we search for a new path in work and life we remain in control and we build our self-esteem.
Envy is a feeling every person comes to know at least once in life.
When we want to find out why we sometimes feel envy we have to ask ourselves what happens to us before we feel it.
Most often the reason for envy is comparison. At the moment we compare ourselves with others we can feel envy in us. Looking at other people we can get the impression that they are happier than we are or whatever seemingly better attribute we want to give.
In fact when we think about it we have to admit that there is no reason to feel envy. We can only see the outer part of people, we don’t see behind their life role or life mask.
The other point is even more important: we can’t compare ourselves to others. There is no basis for comparison because everybody is unique.
Esteem teaches us this life lesson. There is no reason to envy others because all of us are matchless. There is no other person on earth who is the similar to you.
Esteem doesn’t know envy – in the contrary esteem grants everybody his unique preciousness.